Thursday, April 24, 2008

Reality TV Butches (Another One Bites The Dust)

Dammit! There goes another one.

I'm addicted to cooking shows. Seriously. I adore it, from staying up late watching old-school Japanese "Iron Chef" (the new American remake sucks!), Bam!ing with Emeril, lusting after Italian beauty Giada De Laurentiis and charming Tyler Florence. Nothing is sexier than someone who can cook, and cook well and with confidence. So of course I already loved Bravo TV's reality cooking show "Top Chef". Then I realize there's a freaking hot butch lesbian on the show . . . and I melt and tune in all the more fervently. Jennifer Biesty (pictured left) was adorable in her fauxhawk, charming and kind, and with none of the typical virulent reality-show star obnoxiousness. And I wanted to eat her. I mean, eat her food. (Damn Freudian slips!).

And then she got eliminated. Grrr. Anger directed at Padma Lakshmi and Tom Colicchio. But I guess that's the name of the game. I started thinking about all the other reality-show butches who have unfortunately been kicked off before their prime. I suppose there's something to be said for television that even gives butch gals a chance and some visibility (and is a sad indictment that we can't get some fictional butch representation on the airwaves). And yet they seem to fall so quickly in their prime, and while it may be perfectly legitimate (i.e. kicked off for bad performance and mediocre skills), it still means that I have one less piece of eye candy for me on prime time TV. :(

Just look at Josie Smith-Malave, the "Top Chef" Season 2 contestant. I wasn't much of a fan of her personality (something about her grated me), but she certainly spiced up the nights for me. (And there's something very cool about seeing some non-Caucasian butches). Turns out she was in fact the victim of a homophobic attack . . . . which is an even sadder and more demoralizing event than Jen packing up her knives and leaving.

I was actually out of the country and doing my own thang in Japan when one of the biggest butch visibility phenomena ever occurred. Which is probably better for me, because I would have wanted to kill Tila Tequila (#1 for just being her, and #2 for dropping the best thing she'd never have). But I came back and my online haunts are all abuzz with talk of Dani Campbell, and all I can do is gape to see such an amazing, sexy butch- sorry, apparently I must bow down and use her term 'futch'- making every 13-40 year old woman in America say "Damn! Maybe I'm not so straight after all . . .". You've got to give her props, though, for making it so far in the competition, and now, post-competition, keeping the momentum going: apparently she's starting a clothing line for butch/futch/whatever-you're-calling-her-hot-style girls. I hope it takes off . . . well-styled butches and tomboys are every lesbian/bisexual girl's dream. Look for "Futch" at soon!

And then, even though I'm somewhat digging into the past, and maybe even ancient history, there were America's Next Top Model's (Cycle 5) Kim Stolz (right), lesbian and tomboy/butchy cutie, who had me all giddy. I didn't even get to see Briana Ramirez-Rial's short-lived foray onto American Idol (mostly because I detest and try not to watch any of the show but the funny initial rejections). But just look at that picture (left). That gal looks like a k.d. Lang in the making! *Sigh*

So that's all I have to say for today. Start the funeral dirge for sexy, butch lesbian women on TV, bid farewell to heartthrob Jennifer Biesty, and pray for more.

That's what I'm doing, at least.

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