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Showing posts with label girls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label girls. Show all posts
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Girls Gone Wild, Dyke Style
Isn't it about time we updated the BurLEZk Live movies? The movies (the original and its sequel) contained stripteases, performance art, and other erotic burlesque at a lesbian bar, combining real-life lesbian sexiness with the charge and thrill of live action for an audience. The movies are also more than 20 years old, and I can tell ya that if anything, we've got even more deliciously titillating performances going on in our bars and clubs now.
The whole "Girls Gone Wild" franchise has always seemed pretty dang stupid to me- it's mostly softcore (which basically means it has to be really good to make up for lack of explicitness!), it's got not-so-great principles ("We'll give you a shirt if you show us your boobs!"), and I'm just not that fond of drunken fakey chicks camera-whoring it up. And the "lesbian action"? Please.
But despite all of this, I think the general concept is solid. It takes a few of our favorite things: cute, sexy girls, reality, or at least reality-style, TV, a harkening back to our youthful days and getting to vicariously get in the pants of those girls you didn't get to sleep with back in high school and college. It's . . . fun.
I've got this great concept in my head, you see. A queer crew sets with their van and their equipment for a cross-country road trip to some of the best dyke clubs, bars, beach parties, raves, play parties, public sex spaces, and sex clubs- both the famous and the relatively unknown. We're looking for sexiness here- flashing, kissing, bump-n-grind dancing, erotic performances, maybe even the odd sex scene thrown in here and there for the gals who are feeling particularly liberated and exhibitionist. Heck, I still have Gorgeous and Gideon's lovely semi-public sex scene at Jakes On 4th in Olympia, Wa. (from No Fauxxx.com). Now imagine that in a full-fledged feature brimming with sexy bits from pride parades, Folsom Fair, IDKE . . . the list continues. Packed full of more butch, femme, boi, futch, trans, and queer eyecandy than you can get anywhere else, with a natural sort of fun, carefree joy and celebration and a strong sense of [admittedly sexy] community that you just don't necessarily get from an isolated porn.
Am I the only one feeling this? It's like porn . . . and anthropology, combined! Documenting the queer movement while bringing sexy waaaay back. Straight guys have GGW, why shouldn't dykes have their own lesbian-produced version? I'd watch it.
The whole "Girls Gone Wild" franchise has always seemed pretty dang stupid to me- it's mostly softcore (which basically means it has to be really good to make up for lack of explicitness!), it's got not-so-great principles ("We'll give you a shirt if you show us your boobs!"), and I'm just not that fond of drunken fakey chicks camera-whoring it up. And the "lesbian action"? Please.
But despite all of this, I think the general concept is solid. It takes a few of our favorite things: cute, sexy girls, reality, or at least reality-style, TV, a harkening back to our youthful days and getting to vicariously get in the pants of those girls you didn't get to sleep with back in high school and college. It's . . . fun.
I've got this great concept in my head, you see. A queer crew sets with their van and their equipment for a cross-country road trip to some of the best dyke clubs, bars, beach parties, raves, play parties, public sex spaces, and sex clubs- both the famous and the relatively unknown. We're looking for sexiness here- flashing, kissing, bump-n-grind dancing, erotic performances, maybe even the odd sex scene thrown in here and there for the gals who are feeling particularly liberated and exhibitionist. Heck, I still have Gorgeous and Gideon's lovely semi-public sex scene at Jakes On 4th in Olympia, Wa. (from No Fauxxx.com). Now imagine that in a full-fledged feature brimming with sexy bits from pride parades, Folsom Fair, IDKE . . . the list continues. Packed full of more butch, femme, boi, futch, trans, and queer eyecandy than you can get anywhere else, with a natural sort of fun, carefree joy and celebration and a strong sense of [admittedly sexy] community that you just don't necessarily get from an isolated porn.
Am I the only one feeling this? It's like porn . . . and anthropology, combined! Documenting the queer movement while bringing sexy waaaay back. Straight guys have GGW, why shouldn't dykes have their own lesbian-produced version? I'd watch it.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Is It Any Wonder A Girl Turns To Vaginal Sex Instead?
I really like anal stimulation.In a world where the average non-porn female seems anal-phobic, inclined to squeal "But it hurts sooooo much!" and whine and generally act like it's the most perverted act that the whole of mankind ever invented . . . I like it.
I can't even quite describe why I like it. Anal penetration is definitely different than vaginal penetration; anal has never made me gasp in that particular way, and yet I find myself craving it from time to time (oh, listen to that, I sound like a character drawn up in a bad piece of erotica, "craving anal". Lol.). But honestly, I do. It's that sense of fullness, and, oddly enough, that sense of vaginal emptiness at the same time. The way I can slip into gayboy fantasies like I don't have a vagina at all, and that my clit is really a little cock. It's the way when the lube starts to dry up and the dildo/vibrator starts to stick just a little, pulling at my skin slightly, and that extra friction is just fantastic. Heck, it's just the change of pace.
And yet I hardly seem to ever do it, and I'll tell you why: it's a hassle.
When I get up the hankering to play around back, I feel like an old woman. I groan as I haul myself out of bed to go puttering around for some lube, because I don't keep any nearby; usually I get plenty wet enough vaginally to do whatever I want and not need extra lubrication. Then I've got to apply the darn stuff, and I haven't yet found a way to get it inside me without gloopy, gloppy fingers up to the knuckle, and greasy bedsheets from where I've wiped my hands off. Then I've got to lube the toy (more greasy finger smears) and work it in. Pity on me if I haven't put enough lube, or enough deep enough; then we go through the whole process again. And it literally kills me, because 1) it's so freaking messy, 2) it's time-consuming, and 3) if I want to penetrate myself vaginally, I usually don't have to be wet; I can work it in "dry" very quickly and then let myself get warmed up and wet as time progresses. Having to wait for insertion with anal makes me impatient. Then I finally get it in; we're feeling good. Now I run to go get my underwear, because the uncomfortable contortions required to grab a hold of the dildo/vibe just don't work for me. I like to masturbate on my back, legs spread. It's just me. And when I'm having a ball, the dildo's likely to slip out, which isn't a problem with vaginal- I just cram it back in- but with anal, means I have to stop, set down whatever masturbatory aid I'm using, twist to the side to grab it, work it back in. So the underwear come on, pulled up tight to provide a barrier to keep it in at least a little. Then it's back into bed to finally have my time alone. I do, and it's always good, particularly the moments when I've masturbated clitorally almost to the point of orgasm, then let off and literally hump the dildo, and that drives me over the edge. I always find it amazing. But then . . . I have to go do clean-up. With vaginal, the toy rarely needs much. I wipe off my cum easily and it dries away fast to nothing; with anal, the toy's lube is greasy and still there, requiring something to wipe it up. And my butt feels exactly the same way. Although after all sex I usually like to throw a tissue or two down there just to mop up some of the wetness, I can go about my day with a post-orgasm vagina. I cannot with a post-penetrated anus; it's too greasy and wet and drippy feeling to enjoy. So I necessarily must go to the bathroom to clean up shop, so to speak, which completely ruins one of my favorite acts: masturbating myself to sleep as a bedtime ritual. Even if I wanted to bear it out, anal play always makes me need to go to the bathroom anyways. And though it rarely happens to me- maybe 5% of the time- sometimes you've got a little bit of the anal sex-hazardous fecal matter there, meaning now you've got to go wash your hands, and the toy (note: I'm lazy and will probably suffer for it. You should always wash your toys after you use them, anal or not, fecal matter present or not). By the time I get back and am fully done with the experience, I'm happy, satisfied, but wondering "Really? Was it worth it?".
Who knows; maybe partnered anal sex will be better, when I can let my penetrator do all the prep work and just relax and wiggle my tush invitingly. As it is, anal sex exhausts me. So mostly this is a complaint to my butt. Why can't you be more like your sister, my vagina? Why can't you self-lubricate? Why do you have to be the odd one out, the black sheep of this thing we call my erotic body? You're making it really tough on me to give you any of the love we both know you deserve. Shape up, booty.
Anyways, props, gay boys, props. I apparently have neither the patience nor the initiative to do what's needed to freely take it up the tailpipe.
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