Posts
Monday, November 10, 2008
Gender-Bending, Squared
It's a common misconception by those not-in-the-know, I think, that drag queens are simply men who want to be women, and drag kings are simply women who want to be men. The non-queer community has a pretty difficult time differentiating between all those similar T-words- transgender, transsexual, transvestite. Don't even get 'em started on transfags or transdykes! So there's a tendency to believe that if 
you like dressing up and acting like the opposite sex, the only possible reason is because of deep-seated desires to become that sex.Well, cross-dressing transfolk and transfolk in drag totally put that to shame. And I decided to give them some blogspace, to combat the above silly idea (as well as because I find it wonderfully hot and deliciously subversive).
Even though FtM Dan, here in these pictures, (lifted from Photographer Richard A. Chase's journal Commentaries and Love Letters", where you can find a wonderful description of Dan, as well as his own words), is cross-dressing as part of neither a kink nor a drag routine, but instead almost as a way to revisit his past, it's still somewhat incredible to see. If you get confused at the idea of a straight crossdressing man, get ready for your head to spin at Dan- a guy who used to be a girl, dressed in girl's clothes.FtM Adrian Dalton, however, is dressing up in women's clothes for the stage, and his drag persona, the lovely, campy Miss Lola, appears below at roughly 5:49.
If you scour the Internet for MtF drag kings, you do find a few, and they all seem think they're the only ones (yes, we totally need to get them together). The most famous, perhaps, is Brooklynne M. Thomas, who performs as drag king persona U.B. Mackin and his sister persona, Pandora Paradox. But Brooklynne rocks most in my eyes for her brilliant rationale for being a transwoman drag king, "Dissection Of A MtF Drag King".
And let us not forget the wonderful Traci Klawes, who tours with the drag king troupe The Milton Kings and the Tranny Roadshow as Willie P. Fister.
And here's transwoman Natalie practices her drag king routine (her persona is the cleverly-named Isa Jak Ingov).
I just adore all these crazy gender-benders, whose donning of drag is only more of a confirmation that transsexuality is a genetic thing- about the body (and a profound statement on our gender duality- the masculinity and femininity within all of us). Plus, they're SEX-AY!
Now That It's (Sorta) Over . . .
Well . . . we lost. Despite my fellow porn enthusiasts going out and buying to your heart's content, and despite voting (as I know you all did), we failed to defeat the ban on gay marriage here in California (a.k.a. Prop 8).
Of course, that doesn't mean defeat; the results were so incredibly close, support and opposition was huge on both sides, and, as Jiz Lee so wonderfully brought to my attention, the fight soldiers on. And hooray for that, because the last thing we need is to become demoralized and give up. We do not live in a democracy, where a majority rules our lives- we live in a republic, where the majority rules . . . so long as they don't infringe on our rights. I'd say refusing the right of marriage is one of those that we're entitled to (as citizens, taxpayers, and heck, human beings). So we'll turn to the blindfolded lady Justice and let her weigh it out in the times to come.
But now that all's said and done, I don't want an angry rant about homophobia, or a weepy rant about losing, or even an inspirational manifesto about overcoming. I want to ask: what are we doing?
It's incredible, I think, the amount of money we were able to raise in support of the "No On 8" campaign- a brilliant $38,432,873. We even beat out the other side with their $36,122,538 (not that it helped). I can hardly fathom these numbers- they seem fantastical. All for a few ads to try and sway the general public.
I don't mean to say that opposing Prop 8 isn't important- I hope that it's clear that it's a huge deal and one that certainly makes a difference in lives- it's not just about some abstract "rights", but about respect and tolerance and being acknowledged, in being able to be with your partner, and, for those already married, for staying that way. But was it worth such a price tag?
I'll admit that my thoughts have been seriously swayed by a book I bought a while back- Mattilda Bernstein's That's Revolting. In it are a bevy of essays asking the somewhat taboo question that doesn't get asked nearly enough in queer circles- the biggest of which is "Do we even need marriage?". Some will scream- of course we do! And on the other side of the divide is the radicals who would like to do away with the whole institution on the basis of what it used to be and maybe still stands for (the symbolic passing over of a bride from her father to her new husband as chattel?), or favor the philsophical approach that we don't need no stinkin' pieces of paper to prove our bonds. You've got queer folks who want to get married, queer folks who don't and never would, thinking it's too "straight", queer folks who want to have something but don't want to call it marriage, and those who won't stand for anything less than the M word. There isn't a queer around (I think) who says we don't deserve the right to marriage; that's a given. But as to whether we ought be fighting one of our many battles here, on this issue, and spending our money here, I just don't know if it's that clear-cut.
The various essays bring up strong, radical points that I don't always believe/agree with, but which are provocative nonetheless. Is marriage, and this fight for gay marriage, a fight that only benefits some queers? Does it represent a class of relatively elite, affluent, mainly white conservative (i.e. non-radical, not non-liberal) gays and lesbians, who have a vested interest in the institution of marriage, and the privileges it brings, both pyschological, in social reception, and least not in asset sharing and whatnot? How much of the fight for gay marriage has to do with wanting the status and privilege that comes with it, and the normalizing effect that goes with it? I'm not saying that queer folks are somehow less equipped or less inclined to go hand-in-hand with marriage. Gay marriage naturally belongs on the list of the gay agenda list (you know, the real one, not the one that has 'recruit and convert all the innocent chitlins on it).
My question is this: could that money have been put to other, better use? How many lives could have been bettered if the money went to helping the queers that get left out of the HRC meetings, or blatantly turned away? What if instead of waging a neverending battle against the lies thrown out by the Prop 8 supporters, the money was used for organizations with outreach and education? What if we created more and helped keep the public queer spaces open? How about providing aid to the GLBTQ homeless and at-risk youth?
Those are just some of the thoughts running through my head. Hmm.
Of course, that doesn't mean defeat; the results were so incredibly close, support and opposition was huge on both sides, and, as Jiz Lee so wonderfully brought to my attention, the fight soldiers on. And hooray for that, because the last thing we need is to become demoralized and give up. We do not live in a democracy, where a majority rules our lives- we live in a republic, where the majority rules . . . so long as they don't infringe on our rights. I'd say refusing the right of marriage is one of those that we're entitled to (as citizens, taxpayers, and heck, human beings). So we'll turn to the blindfolded lady Justice and let her weigh it out in the times to come.
But now that all's said and done, I don't want an angry rant about homophobia, or a weepy rant about losing, or even an inspirational manifesto about overcoming. I want to ask: what are we doing?
It's incredible, I think, the amount of money we were able to raise in support of the "No On 8" campaign- a brilliant $38,432,873. We even beat out the other side with their $36,122,538 (not that it helped). I can hardly fathom these numbers- they seem fantastical. All for a few ads to try and sway the general public.
I don't mean to say that opposing Prop 8 isn't important- I hope that it's clear that it's a huge deal and one that certainly makes a difference in lives- it's not just about some abstract "rights", but about respect and tolerance and being acknowledged, in being able to be with your partner, and, for those already married, for staying that way. But was it worth such a price tag?
I'll admit that my thoughts have been seriously swayed by a book I bought a while back- Mattilda Bernstein's That's Revolting. In it are a bevy of essays asking the somewhat taboo question that doesn't get asked nearly enough in queer circles- the biggest of which is "Do we even need marriage?". Some will scream- of course we do! And on the other side of the divide is the radicals who would like to do away with the whole institution on the basis of what it used to be and maybe still stands for (the symbolic passing over of a bride from her father to her new husband as chattel?), or favor the philsophical approach that we don't need no stinkin' pieces of paper to prove our bonds. You've got queer folks who want to get married, queer folks who don't and never would, thinking it's too "straight", queer folks who want to have something but don't want to call it marriage, and those who won't stand for anything less than the M word. There isn't a queer around (I think) who says we don't deserve the right to marriage; that's a given. But as to whether we ought be fighting one of our many battles here, on this issue, and spending our money here, I just don't know if it's that clear-cut.
The various essays bring up strong, radical points that I don't always believe/agree with, but which are provocative nonetheless. Is marriage, and this fight for gay marriage, a fight that only benefits some queers? Does it represent a class of relatively elite, affluent, mainly white conservative (i.e. non-radical, not non-liberal) gays and lesbians, who have a vested interest in the institution of marriage, and the privileges it brings, both pyschological, in social reception, and least not in asset sharing and whatnot? How much of the fight for gay marriage has to do with wanting the status and privilege that comes with it, and the normalizing effect that goes with it? I'm not saying that queer folks are somehow less equipped or less inclined to go hand-in-hand with marriage. Gay marriage naturally belongs on the list of the gay agenda list (you know, the real one, not the one that has 'recruit and convert all the innocent chitlins on it).
My question is this: could that money have been put to other, better use? How many lives could have been bettered if the money went to helping the queers that get left out of the HRC meetings, or blatantly turned away? What if instead of waging a neverending battle against the lies thrown out by the Prop 8 supporters, the money was used for organizations with outreach and education? What if we created more and helped keep the public queer spaces open? How about providing aid to the GLBTQ homeless and at-risk youth?
Those are just some of the thoughts running through my head. Hmm.
Monday, November 3, 2008
Fellatio Singalong
Remember when I did the Cunnilingus Singalong? Well, now it's the boys' turn. I'm just sad I couldn't find any songs about gay fellatio!
1) The Waitstaff's "The Blowjob Song". It's so adorable. Everybody's smiling- cuz they're thinking about blowjobs. ;)
2) "The Blowjob Song" by Richy. A song that manages to be coy- you know what they're talking about, but you want to say "Nah, it's about lollipops!". And it'll get stuck in your head all day, guaranteed.
3) Jonathan Fin's "Blowjob Song". Not a fave, really, because if somebody said "You fucking bitch, your hand doesn't belong there at all.", I'd definitely get down on my knees to give them a blowjob- and then bite it off. But it's still stupidly catchy.
4) "The Blowjob Song" by Blink 182. Sophomoric humor dealing with sex and your mom (as is 95% of teen boys'- and adult mens'- humor), but it's very famous.
5) "Suck My Cock" by . . . I'm not sure. I couldn't find out! But it's perfect- Christmas is coming, sooner than you think!
6) "The Most Offensive Song Ever" from "South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut". Very fitting, considering how many kids nowadays don't think that oral sex compromises one's virginity.
7) "Gimmie Some Head" by dilly21ny. Nice beat!
8) G.G. Allin's "Blowjobs". A little poor quality here, but still head-boppitty.
9) "Suck My Dick" by Sleezy Dee and The Suck My Dick Krew. I'm pretty sure a song about fellatio can't fail when it's written by the "The Suck My Dick Krew".
10) Carl Meachin's "Can I Have A Blowjob?". I like this one, because there's a very polite "please" at the end there. Always nice to be polite when requesting oral lovin' because you haven't got the energy to fuck.
11) Barkymark's "Blow Job". Added in because he sings very nicely and I didn't want to forget him.
So go on, serenade somebody, all you boys (and girls with your strap-ons!), and get some head!
1) The Waitstaff's "The Blowjob Song". It's so adorable. Everybody's smiling- cuz they're thinking about blowjobs. ;)
2) "The Blowjob Song" by Richy. A song that manages to be coy- you know what they're talking about, but you want to say "Nah, it's about lollipops!". And it'll get stuck in your head all day, guaranteed.
3) Jonathan Fin's "Blowjob Song". Not a fave, really, because if somebody said "You fucking bitch, your hand doesn't belong there at all.", I'd definitely get down on my knees to give them a blowjob- and then bite it off. But it's still stupidly catchy.
4) "The Blowjob Song" by Blink 182. Sophomoric humor dealing with sex and your mom (as is 95% of teen boys'- and adult mens'- humor), but it's very famous.
5) "Suck My Cock" by . . . I'm not sure. I couldn't find out! But it's perfect- Christmas is coming, sooner than you think!
6) "The Most Offensive Song Ever" from "South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut". Very fitting, considering how many kids nowadays don't think that oral sex compromises one's virginity.
7) "Gimmie Some Head" by dilly21ny. Nice beat!
8) G.G. Allin's "Blowjobs". A little poor quality here, but still head-boppitty.
9) "Suck My Dick" by Sleezy Dee and The Suck My Dick Krew. I'm pretty sure a song about fellatio can't fail when it's written by the "The Suck My Dick Krew".
10) Carl Meachin's "Can I Have A Blowjob?". I like this one, because there's a very polite "please" at the end there. Always nice to be polite when requesting oral lovin' because you haven't got the energy to fuck.
11) Barkymark's "Blow Job". Added in because he sings very nicely and I didn't want to forget him.
So go on, serenade somebody, all you boys (and girls with your strap-ons!), and get some head!
Finite Resources, Infinite Good Causes
There is a question that still manages to plague me, even after contemplating it since forever: where should I buy my sex supplies?Easy, you say. Buy it from wherever they sell it.
But it's not so easy. Just look at my fave retailers at the right; although they each have their particular strengths and weaknesses, I hold Blowfish, Babeland, and Good Vibrations in pretty much the same regard. There are no real favorites- they all rock, both in their service and selections, and in their company ethos. And that's forgetting all the little companies- Good For Her, Smitten Kitten, Early2Bed, and on and on with others I should know. Should I support these little companies who are still struggling, and forgo those big companies who are well-off enough to miss out on my purchase of a $20 dildo? That always seems like reverse capitalism to me- an act that, in effect, punishes companies who have found success through their hard work, good customer service, and superior product selection. How's that for incentive? And what's more- when I give my money to a big company that I support and shares my views and outlooks, my chances increase, as all that extra capital spills over into new ventures- a store opening close(r) to me, for example (so I can actually walk in, instead of doing only online orders!), or making their own porn or sex toys. If a good deal of people had funneled their funds into other smaller companies instead of Blowfish, would the result have been many medium-sized and growing companies, and Blowfish not helping to release and distribute Pink & White's films? Heaven forbid!
And this isn't even taking into account buying sex toys through folks who get kickbacks when you shop through their links. Should I purchase this DVD from my favorite blogger X, who gets a small percentage of that, thus telling them they have fans and hopefully increasing their output and awesomeness? What about paying for Jiz Lee's eye surgery (because I figure the best way to keep her making fantastic porn is to keep her happy)? Or should it go to institution Y, whose goals I truly support and believe in? And for heaven's sake, what about institution Z? Both Y and Z are great causes! This isn't even a problem of donation, where it's all charitable; I'm going to buy the sex toy anyway for my own selfish reasons, and I just want to help somebody in the meantime.
And speaking of it, what about donating to causes? I've made it clear before- I'm poor and broke. But I want to help, and I want to see change in so many places. Where should my money go? To big organizations who are doing relatively fine on their own? To small ones who really need the help, but probably won't be affecting any real change for a long while, or not without some massive donations? How am I supposed to rank my interests- should I donate to free speech, or sex worker rights, or feminist causes, or defending our porn, or political parties (which, with my third party-support, would probably be seen as wasted anyways), or voting down/up propositions, or what?
And then let us not forget that naggling part of me that says "Here you are whining about how to put your measly money to good use- how about doing something for real?". I have limited money, so why aren't I writing letters to Congress, marching in protests, volunteering my time? How long can I pretend that donating money isn't just a sorry way to excuse laziness by forking over some cash in a hostile hostage exchange for my conscience and sense of satisfaction as a do-gooder?
Ugh. I'm overwhelmed by choices, frustrated by my inefficacy.
How do you do it, my readers? Whether it's giving donations or just making your purchases, how do you choose the recipient of your time, your effort, your money, your business? When there are so many good people out there, great businesses, wonderful institutions, how do you mete out your input?
And Eros-Zine Was Gone . . .
Even though I knew the site was dead and no longer being updated when I put it on my blogroll or even wrote about it here, I still wanted to list Eros-Zine, because they had an amazing backlog of wonderful posts- porn reviews, interviews, news headlines, erotic photography and artistry . . . the list goes on.
Then I went to look up something today, and it's all gone.
I'm not quite sure if somebody else bought the domain name and kept the overall layout, or if the owners decided to reduce the room they were taking up on the server and keep the site alive by getting some advertisers, but now it's little more than a page full of links, albeit links to good places, like Kink.com's sites and the Stockroom and all that.
I'm actually pretty sad. Back when I was a wee little queer thang just barely standing up on her wobbly Bambi legs, some blessed person in the Bisexual.com forums wrote a post about a movie called "The Crash Pad". I went to Google and typed it in. One of the first sites that came up was Eros-Zine, with a review of the movie, and even up until it was gone, it was one of the only reviews that featured pictures of everyone- Dylan, Shawn, Jiz, Jo, Dusty Ryder. And the review was spot-on. I bought it, became a pervalicious queer chick (as happens to anyone who views the film, naturally), and haven't looked back since. Eros-Zine introduced me to Marty Klein, author of one of my favorite blogs, Sexual Intlligence. And before I knew about other erotic blogs and adult industry news sources, I checked there daily to learn about Morty Diamond and Tony Comstock and Eon McKai. In other words, it was a crucial aid in making me who I am today.
So, bye, Eros-Zine. I suppose I should remove you from my blogroll, and let this post serve as a memory of what was. Thanks for everything.
Then I went to look up something today, and it's all gone.
I'm not quite sure if somebody else bought the domain name and kept the overall layout, or if the owners decided to reduce the room they were taking up on the server and keep the site alive by getting some advertisers, but now it's little more than a page full of links, albeit links to good places, like Kink.com's sites and the Stockroom and all that.
I'm actually pretty sad. Back when I was a wee little queer thang just barely standing up on her wobbly Bambi legs, some blessed person in the Bisexual.com forums wrote a post about a movie called "The Crash Pad". I went to Google and typed it in. One of the first sites that came up was Eros-Zine, with a review of the movie, and even up until it was gone, it was one of the only reviews that featured pictures of everyone- Dylan, Shawn, Jiz, Jo, Dusty Ryder. And the review was spot-on. I bought it, became a pervalicious queer chick (as happens to anyone who views the film, naturally), and haven't looked back since. Eros-Zine introduced me to Marty Klein, author of one of my favorite blogs, Sexual Intlligence. And before I knew about other erotic blogs and adult industry news sources, I checked there daily to learn about Morty Diamond and Tony Comstock and Eon McKai. In other words, it was a crucial aid in making me who I am today.
So, bye, Eros-Zine. I suppose I should remove you from my blogroll, and let this post serve as a memory of what was. Thanks for everything.
When Non-Fetishists Shoot Fetish Porn
This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.Friday, October 31, 2008
$2,096 Closer To Equality!
Well, first off, Happy Halloween! Be sure to be safe and all that tonight as you celebrate this delightful Paganistic holiday, flouncing around in your incredibly slutty costumes, as I'm sure you are.
Secondly, rock on, you awesome people! Of course you remember my urging you to buy porn AND simultaneously support "No On Prop 8" campaign, and ya'll came through.
The official numbers are out:
Comstock Films raised a whopping $1,596! Pink & White Productions raised $500! Both numbers are awesome!
Together, we can keep Shine Louise Houston (and many, many others!) married and able to do so.
And even though it's not directly Prop 8-related, I did a little something on my part (other than donating and blogging, that is):
It's not much, but it's something, right?
Secondly, rock on, you awesome people! Of course you remember my urging you to buy porn AND simultaneously support "No On Prop 8" campaign, and ya'll came through.
The official numbers are out:
Comstock Films raised a whopping $1,596! Pink & White Productions raised $500! Both numbers are awesome!
Together, we can keep Shine Louise Houston (and many, many others!) married and able to do so.
And even though it's not directly Prop 8-related, I did a little something on my part (other than donating and blogging, that is):
It's not much, but it's something, right?
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