Posts
Monday, August 25, 2008
Porn Pusher, a.k.a. Promoting To The Masses
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Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Drag Queen Dreams
Anybody who knows me knows that I hate wearing makeup. I mean, the odds are already stacked against me:1) It takes time. And, if you're going to do it right, at least a good fifteen minutes. I love sleep. I'd rather have a good fifteen minutes of extra sleep than having to haul my butt out of bed to apply what will presumably rub off my face two hours later. Yeah, I'm lazy.
2) Directly relatedo to #1 and linked by the laziness is the fact that I can be somewhat iffy on showers and washing my face; often I just crash into bed at the end of a long day. Easy to forget makeup, which likes to be washed off . . . and presto, you have instant, unforgiveable acne!
3) I hate the way it feels. I like to be comfortable- everywhere. Hair down and natural (no stiff, gelled-up locks I can't run my fingers through), loose clothes, flat shoes, and I can hardly even stand my bra. Makeup literally feels greasy and heavy on my face; I can't stand it.
4) I don't want to be self-conscious. My few forays of wearing makeup, particularly eye makeup, have shown that I touch my face a lot. If I want to leave it unmarred, I have to concentrate on it, and that makes me a whole lot less laid-back and happy.
5) It's expensive. At least, the good stuff is. And I'd rather spend my money on books, movies, CD's, porn, and food.
6) It makes me look less like myself. Just like lots of people are unrecognizable without their makeup, I look like a different person, and what's more, everybody wonders why. All of the sudden it becomes "Oh, you look pretty today! What's the occasion?". And when I have none, I feel foolish. Moreover, I don't want to suddenly be a slave to makeup, having to wear it lest people judge made-up me to non-made-up me. And of course, I'm not going to be one of those ridiculous girls who put on makeup only to have it look like I'm wearing none.
And there are more reasons. But that's why I just don't want to wear makeup on a regular basis. Having said all of that, though . . .
I fucking love playing dress-up. There's nothing like having a free afternoon and getting the old urge to rifle through my cosmetic pots to come up with something crazy, wild, and unapologetically queer. So I thought I'd share some fun "drag queen"-style shots I got when I did a little impromptu photoshoot after playing dress-up. They came out so suprisingly good . . . even if they don't look hardly drag queeny (Sigh. How can I get the great makeup skills they have?).
If I was feeling more up to it, I'd make this post deep and introspective- all about how my love of over-the-top makeup is probably hiding interesting issues of fear of femininity and competition with women, and how my identification with drag queens hints at discomfort with acknowledging my female gender or maybe is an attempt to trivialize femme urgings that I feel are too "mainstream" for a wacked-out girl who desperately wants to be read as queer.But I'm too tired for that. Concentrate on pretty pictures, instead.
Monday, August 18, 2008
Is Lindsay Lohan A Lesbian?
Honestly, I could care less.Actually, I do care a little bit . . . why does the media and collective world around me insist on using the word "lesbian" (or "gay") to describe people who have actively had opposite-sex relationships? Sappho, Oscar Wilde, and now Lindsay Lohan. The girl's dated a handful of boys (Aaron Carter, Wilmer Valderrama, Harry Morton, Calum Best, Riley Giles), so it's obviously just a ploy to capitalize on the shock factor of the L-word. Ah, when will bisexuality get some well-deserved publicity that isn't of the horrendous Katy Perry type?
But once again, I'm like an ADD-addled kid. That wasn't my point at all. Back to the question ("Is Lindsay Lohan lesbian/bisexual?") and my complete and total apathy for the answer.
So why am I blogging about it, you might ask?
Well, it's quite simple- it has nothing to do with Lohan, who hasn't registered on my radar since "The Parent Trap" (okay, okay, and the guilty pleasure that was her first hit, "Rumors"), or with celebrity girl-on-girl extravaganzas . . . it's because the lez-beau in question shocked me quite a bit by her, well, butchness.Every time my eyes wander away from the staring contest the Snickers bar and I are having at the checkout counter to glance the trashy tabloids, there's inevitably some girl kissing some other girl. It's unremarkable- they're both gorgeous femmes, it almost always looks staged, and if it wasn't, there was probably a good deal of alcohol and drugs involved as well. Ugh.
So I studiously stayed away from the rumors I was hearing about Lindsay Lohan (you know, mostly because my general impression was (is?) "skank" when I'm feeling mean, and at best a grudging "poor, messed-up kid" when I'm feeling generous). But somehow I managed to stumble over a picture of Lohan and the rumored girlfriend, and my jaw dropped.
Sam/Samantha Ronson is a total butch lesbian. Or, if you're going to get picky about it, at the very least, andro or "futch". She doesn't look like a girly Hollywood girl. She looks tough, punk (as a DJ'ing gal should be), and she has dyke appeal up the wazoo.
Butch has never had it so good since Portia snagged up Ellen and left all the straight, mainstream folk scratching their heads in confusion, or, for the younger crowd, Tila Tequila showed more interest in Dani Campbell than a house full of Barbie dolls.
Various media sources are all a-frenzy, from conspiracy theories of a publicity grab, that the gals are just friends, and whatnot. I can't say I really care. For once, people are talking about lesbian celebrity kisses, and it kind of seems more authentic than usual. People are talking about a butch gal, and it's not steroetypical or derogatory. And whether the love is real, or fake, or something that will later be deemed a "mistake" by publicists, maybe a few people can think about how butches can be sexy, wonderful partners, if a famous, sexy chick like Lindsay wants herself one.And that's enough to make me happy.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
A Lil' Bit Of Genderqueer In Mainstream Porn
I was pleasantly surprised today. That doesn't happen hardly often enough.
I was actually doing a little Googling for another blog, and I ran across a description of the porn film "Masque". Nothing too special, except for the mention of "Asia Carrera in drag". I did a double take, read it again to make sure, and then did some furious research to discover that yes, it was true.
I bought and downloaded the film and was thrilled to see some brilliant genderqueerness making its way into what was otherwise a pretty mainstream movie. The lovely Asia- or rather, apparently, Samantha, the character she was playing- spoke a bit about always having been a tomboy, being somewhat jealous of the way the boys named their dicks . . . hence she's dressed up like this on Halloween. And she isn't some bad imitation, either- she rivals any veteran drag king, and she looks distinctly queer. She wears unapologetic facial hair, something I simply can't imagine most typical heterosexual male porn watchers to get behind.
I fucking love it.
The tryst is very erotic- some sensual dancing and later strap-on fucking (with an added element of voyeurism)- and well-filmed, but I'm already impressed by the very presence of the boy drag.
So. The rest of the film was unremarkable . . . cheerleader outfits, doctor/nurse play, requisite orgy, yada yada yada. But Asia Carrera in a mustache, tie, and hefty strap-on wooing a girl? Maybe I was wrong about mainstream porn being bland and gender-binary enforcing (or stereotypically "shemale" when not).
I'm happy for today. Thanks, writers Edwin Brown and Oola Bloom!
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Vanessa Del Rio: The Most Expensive Porn Memoir Ever?
It's no secret that folks love reading pornstar autobiographies- they're often bestsellers, in fact. And at normal book prices, who wouldn't want to pick up an exciting, steamy, and [hopefully] seamy look at the industry we're all so curious about? So go on, run out, pick up Jenna Jameson's "How To Make Love Like A Pornstar: A Cautionary Tale" or "Ron Jeremy: The Hardest (Working) Man In Showbiz" for a nice $20.Or if you have some extra cash burning a hole in your pocket . . .
How about unloading $1,500 for the privilege of getting to know the first Latina porn superstar Vanessa del Rio a little better from the 396 pages (and 140 documentary DVD minutes) of her 16 lb. book-slash-memoir Vanessa Del Rio: Fifty Years Of Slightly Slutty Behavior.
I was so surprised by the pricetag that I read up on the star I previously didn't know of . . . and now I'm starting to think I'd like to shell out the money. Click below to find out why Miss Del Rio is so utterly captivating.
As mentioned above, the book is hardly just that. Besides being massive, including a documentary video, and (if it's in the first of the 200 numbered copies) signed by Vanessa herself, one lucky buyer will find the Charlie and the Chocolate Factory-esque "Golden Ticket"- good for a date with Vanessa, photographed by a famous photographer. And actually, if you're smart enough to avoid Amazon.com, you'll find the exact same book sold for $1,100 less- only $400 at her website, with three DVD's or VHS's of your choice thrown in for free as well.
That's pretty damn amazing. But then again, so is this lady.
Everything I read about her on the web- and particularly the interviews- paint a portrait of a very strong, smart, and fun-loving woman, the product of the sexually free 70's. Consider this quote:
"Listen, you can’t unring a bell. I can’t be a porn apologist. You can’t undo the fun. I just considered my life an adventure. It’s like, I let the wind blow me—pun intended—wherever… Everything that you could consider exploitative, I found something to get out of it."
So . . . no. I don't have $1,500 for this book. I don't even have $400 for it from Vanessa's website. And I doubt my library's going to start carrying it. So, until then, I guess I won't get a better look into this fascinating woman's life.
But maybe you will be able to. If you can afford it, enjoy!
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Real Comprehensive Sex Education
I'm getting pretty damn tired of reading about sex-related deaths in the news, especially when, in most cases, it's entirely preventable. And that's what makes it frightening. Even more frightening, however, might be the fact that I'm not talking about sexually transmitted diseases.
As the Center for Disesase Control releases new information that statistics on HIV and AIDS have been underreported and people get up in arms about bettering sex education- something I want very much- I nonetheless start to get a little ancy.
Undoubtedly, more education is always better. And yet I can't help but think that sex education reform- prompted by the CDC's report and these studies which have shown that abstinence-only education doesn't delay sex in teenagers- will change very much.
Yes, there will finally be correct statistics about birth control and more information on preventing the spread of disease. However, the only safety issues facing teenagers are not just these two. Why are we always talking about safe sex only in terms of STD's and pregnancy? People are getting injured- and in some cases even dying- because they are having unsafe sex. And more often than not, this unsafe sex features all the condoms and clean bills of sexual health and latex barriers you could ever want.
There are countless books, magazine articles, websites, and TV shows dedicated to the art of sex help, and the questions about having sex safely (or dealing with the consequences of unsafe sex after the fact) that appear therein are not just about STD's and pregnancy. As people everywhere are exposed to more and more types of kinky fun through TV, movies, and the Internet, they often attempt them with no thought to issues of safety. And that, unfortunately, is how people end up heartbroken, injured, dead, or in jail.
Let me throw up a list of nine potential dangers that are in dire need of discussion and information dissemination:
1) Anal sex. More and more people are doing it- men and women both. And given today's youth's reasoning that anal sex doesn't compromise one's virginity (a whole 'nother can of worms) and erroneous belief that it is 100% pregnancy-proof, it's often the go-to sex for those young and unwed. Nobody is discussing the various, very real dangers of anal sex: the risk of urinary tract infection in men from performing anal sex without a condom, cross-contamination and potential infections from using objects in the vagina that were previously in the anus, using popular numbing lubes to mask warning pain, tears in the anal lining that may become infected and lead to very painful and serious fistulas (particularly in women), and the very ubiquitous emergency room situation wherein something- sex toy or other foreign object- becomes lost in your lower intestine because it didn't have a flared base (or wasn't meant to go up there in the first place).
2) Breath play. While it might seem like an obscure branch of hardcore BDSM, more children and teens are dying than anyone could expect, as the "Choking Game" remains popular, yet is rarely discussed. Erotic asphyxiation often remains a very, very, very dangerous solitary masturbatory aid for many- many times fatal. And perhaps even more frightening for the BDSM practicioner who prides him/herself on safety, the greatest danger of this act is not actually strangulation- most people who die doing this die of a massive heart attack, usually 15 or 20 minutes after they’re done.
3) Porn addiction. Long gone are the days when a teenager's- or even an adult's- porn collection consisted of some occasionally-visited dirty magazines. The Internet's seductive pull means trillions of images and videos are right at your fingertips- a load of media so massive it can become almost confusing and very hard to handle in a reasonable way. More and more kids and teenagers complain of being addicted to porn, and whether it's a true and real psychological addiction or just worried concerns over their constant usage, it's an important issue . . . that nobody is talking about.
4) Pedophilia charges. And no, I'm not talking about overly-hyped "predator" scares that make parents run to block Myspace on their computers. Rather, with cell phone cameras, the glamorous idea of taping your own sex and taking sexual pictures, and the ease of sending such through the medium of the Internet, a big problem has arisen: older teens (16, 17) are taking pictures and video of themselves, provocative, naked, having sex, just like a million other consenting adults. Whether they keep them to themselves or share them with their boyfriends/girlfriends, they are very often unaware that possessing such erotic material is illegal and can get them branded a pedophile, something that can haunt them for the rest of their lives. How can something so potentially dangerous not be warned about?
5) Constriction. And once again, in the trend of Internet-related dangers, here comes that spam e-mail trumpeting that you can get a bigger penis. Combine that with constant cheesy but reputable-looking Enzyte commercials, and guys are (more) worried about their penis size- enough so to seek out penis pumps, to try jelqing, and to otherwise constrict their wangs. Unfortunately, this can lead to rupturing capillaries and blood vessels in the penis, and even internal hemorrhaging that might lead to impotence or Peyronie’s Disease- neither good things, and definitely not something you want happening from a simple wank!
6) BDSM/kink. It's become so mainstream that everybody seems to want to try it, even if it's only lightly tying up their lover and splashing some candle wax on them. Unfortunately, novices are the ones who are bound to make more mistakes- ones that can cause lots of injuries. Using wrong (and common household) materials to bind can end up causing nerve damage, circulation problems can come from positions and not moving enough, the aforementioned breath play can kill someone, and the candles we often have at home- something pink and scented from Bath & Body Works- burn infinitely hotter and blister skin due to their chemicals for color and scents. People who want more intense/extreme acts might go even more dangerous- with the very not-to-be-done-by-amateurs e-stim- and many times die because of it. And, as often comes when participating as the do-er in extreme BDSM acts, you run the risk of causing death . . . and as if that isn't enough, you will probably be convicted and sentenced for your part in it, however unintentional it was.
7) Dangerous masturbation. People love to masturbate, and they love to make it better, sexier, kinkier. Unfortunately, especially when they're underage, teens can't get the safe sex toys to do it. That's when they get the wacky idea to use some unconvential stuff . . . though not only youngsters are doing it. Trips to the emergency room and potential long-term damage (not to mention a ton of embarrassment) await the ill-informed, from sticking your penis into vacuum cleaners or pool water jets, it's going to be bad. And it's not just the boys- one doctor reported a young woman with an acute onset of abdominal pain, who was found to have extensive pneumoperitoneum (i.e. an air embolism), which came from some Jacuzzi jet stimulation. Fortunately, it only gave her some pain- air embolisms can be potentially fatal.
8) Poppers. Schools can't seem to get enough of telling kids to stay away from the drugs- especially ones with very small risks like marijuana. But somehow they seem to gloss over poppers, or amyl nitrate, so often used in the gay community and other progressive sexual communities. Considering how dangerous and degenerative their effects can truly be, I find it apalling.
9) Alternative lifestyles. And no, I'm not talking about the textbook "gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender" cliche. All over the place, kids are getting ideas about trying different arrangements, and yet there is little, if any, discussion about polyamory, something difficult even for the seasoned and informed. As more and more younguns come out and identify as bisexual, they are often confronted with the possibility of threesomes and polyamory, and it's truly complex. Why isn't such advice about handling emotions and fostering communication about this given alongside that for two-party relationships?
I look forward to sex education getting a little bit better, but I'd much rather overthrow the whole thing and start from scratch- Carol Queen and the Center for Sex & Culture sending out licensed sexologists to discuss not only those issues of STD's and pregnancy, but all of the ways that sex can be made safer.
As the Center for Disesase Control releases new information that statistics on HIV and AIDS have been underreported and people get up in arms about bettering sex education- something I want very much- I nonetheless start to get a little ancy.
Undoubtedly, more education is always better. And yet I can't help but think that sex education reform- prompted by the CDC's report and these studies which have shown that abstinence-only education doesn't delay sex in teenagers- will change very much.
Yes, there will finally be correct statistics about birth control and more information on preventing the spread of disease. However, the only safety issues facing teenagers are not just these two. Why are we always talking about safe sex only in terms of STD's and pregnancy? People are getting injured- and in some cases even dying- because they are having unsafe sex. And more often than not, this unsafe sex features all the condoms and clean bills of sexual health and latex barriers you could ever want.
There are countless books, magazine articles, websites, and TV shows dedicated to the art of sex help, and the questions about having sex safely (or dealing with the consequences of unsafe sex after the fact) that appear therein are not just about STD's and pregnancy. As people everywhere are exposed to more and more types of kinky fun through TV, movies, and the Internet, they often attempt them with no thought to issues of safety. And that, unfortunately, is how people end up heartbroken, injured, dead, or in jail.
Let me throw up a list of nine potential dangers that are in dire need of discussion and information dissemination:
1) Anal sex. More and more people are doing it- men and women both. And given today's youth's reasoning that anal sex doesn't compromise one's virginity (a whole 'nother can of worms) and erroneous belief that it is 100% pregnancy-proof, it's often the go-to sex for those young and unwed. Nobody is discussing the various, very real dangers of anal sex: the risk of urinary tract infection in men from performing anal sex without a condom, cross-contamination and potential infections from using objects in the vagina that were previously in the anus, using popular numbing lubes to mask warning pain, tears in the anal lining that may become infected and lead to very painful and serious fistulas (particularly in women), and the very ubiquitous emergency room situation wherein something- sex toy or other foreign object- becomes lost in your lower intestine because it didn't have a flared base (or wasn't meant to go up there in the first place).
2) Breath play. While it might seem like an obscure branch of hardcore BDSM, more children and teens are dying than anyone could expect, as the "Choking Game" remains popular, yet is rarely discussed. Erotic asphyxiation often remains a very, very, very dangerous solitary masturbatory aid for many- many times fatal. And perhaps even more frightening for the BDSM practicioner who prides him/herself on safety, the greatest danger of this act is not actually strangulation- most people who die doing this die of a massive heart attack, usually 15 or 20 minutes after they’re done.
3) Porn addiction. Long gone are the days when a teenager's- or even an adult's- porn collection consisted of some occasionally-visited dirty magazines. The Internet's seductive pull means trillions of images and videos are right at your fingertips- a load of media so massive it can become almost confusing and very hard to handle in a reasonable way. More and more kids and teenagers complain of being addicted to porn, and whether it's a true and real psychological addiction or just worried concerns over their constant usage, it's an important issue . . . that nobody is talking about.
4) Pedophilia charges. And no, I'm not talking about overly-hyped "predator" scares that make parents run to block Myspace on their computers. Rather, with cell phone cameras, the glamorous idea of taping your own sex and taking sexual pictures, and the ease of sending such through the medium of the Internet, a big problem has arisen: older teens (16, 17) are taking pictures and video of themselves, provocative, naked, having sex, just like a million other consenting adults. Whether they keep them to themselves or share them with their boyfriends/girlfriends, they are very often unaware that possessing such erotic material is illegal and can get them branded a pedophile, something that can haunt them for the rest of their lives. How can something so potentially dangerous not be warned about?
5) Constriction. And once again, in the trend of Internet-related dangers, here comes that spam e-mail trumpeting that you can get a bigger penis. Combine that with constant cheesy but reputable-looking Enzyte commercials, and guys are (more) worried about their penis size- enough so to seek out penis pumps, to try jelqing, and to otherwise constrict their wangs. Unfortunately, this can lead to rupturing capillaries and blood vessels in the penis, and even internal hemorrhaging that might lead to impotence or Peyronie’s Disease- neither good things, and definitely not something you want happening from a simple wank!
6) BDSM/kink. It's become so mainstream that everybody seems to want to try it, even if it's only lightly tying up their lover and splashing some candle wax on them. Unfortunately, novices are the ones who are bound to make more mistakes- ones that can cause lots of injuries. Using wrong (and common household) materials to bind can end up causing nerve damage, circulation problems can come from positions and not moving enough, the aforementioned breath play can kill someone, and the candles we often have at home- something pink and scented from Bath & Body Works- burn infinitely hotter and blister skin due to their chemicals for color and scents. People who want more intense/extreme acts might go even more dangerous- with the very not-to-be-done-by-amateurs e-stim- and many times die because of it. And, as often comes when participating as the do-er in extreme BDSM acts, you run the risk of causing death . . . and as if that isn't enough, you will probably be convicted and sentenced for your part in it, however unintentional it was.
7) Dangerous masturbation. People love to masturbate, and they love to make it better, sexier, kinkier. Unfortunately, especially when they're underage, teens can't get the safe sex toys to do it. That's when they get the wacky idea to use some unconvential stuff . . . though not only youngsters are doing it. Trips to the emergency room and potential long-term damage (not to mention a ton of embarrassment) await the ill-informed, from sticking your penis into vacuum cleaners or pool water jets, it's going to be bad. And it's not just the boys- one doctor reported a young woman with an acute onset of abdominal pain, who was found to have extensive pneumoperitoneum (i.e. an air embolism), which came from some Jacuzzi jet stimulation. Fortunately, it only gave her some pain- air embolisms can be potentially fatal.
8) Poppers. Schools can't seem to get enough of telling kids to stay away from the drugs- especially ones with very small risks like marijuana. But somehow they seem to gloss over poppers, or amyl nitrate, so often used in the gay community and other progressive sexual communities. Considering how dangerous and degenerative their effects can truly be, I find it apalling.
9) Alternative lifestyles. And no, I'm not talking about the textbook "gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender" cliche. All over the place, kids are getting ideas about trying different arrangements, and yet there is little, if any, discussion about polyamory, something difficult even for the seasoned and informed. As more and more younguns come out and identify as bisexual, they are often confronted with the possibility of threesomes and polyamory, and it's truly complex. Why isn't such advice about handling emotions and fostering communication about this given alongside that for two-party relationships?
I look forward to sex education getting a little bit better, but I'd much rather overthrow the whole thing and start from scratch- Carol Queen and the Center for Sex & Culture sending out licensed sexologists to discuss not only those issues of STD's and pregnancy, but all of the ways that sex can be made safer.
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Bad News: Libido.com Calls It Quits
This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.
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